My last day at William Parker was not in July but at the end of August. Not only contractually but emotionally too.  It took part of two days to move my thirty years accumulation of resources (stuff!) and to evacuate the chapel vestry/office.  No more will I sit at my desk looking along the path that leads to the upper school, tend God’s Garden with its memorial trees, or prepare the chapel for Eucharist. No more Commems to plan, no more Prayer Spaces, Remembrance ceremonies, chapel exhibitions, Hot Chocolate Club…..  My ‘Collective Worships’ were finished two years ago, but a chaplaincy has been maintained beyond that sad termination. I have given my best for my best years. I have done it for the boys and I have done it for the Lord.

There is much for which I am so grateful to God.

1. The Lord’s providence in bringing to an end this chapter. For years I have needed to do less. I have not been able to determine which of three major commitments should be concluded. I have always said that I would need to be forced to give up something. That is what has happened: I have been made redundant.  I have prayed for guidance and this is it.  Now I can concentrate on church and early education and know that it is the will of God.
2. The gospel ministry to so may young men and staff too. I have always justified my time spent in secondary school by saying that if you want to win the young you must go where they are. Apart from individual encounters, for most of the thirty years, I have addressed more than 1000 students at least once a week. Time and again in the town I meet men, not all so very young, who greet me and tell me which talk they remember especially and what they learnt through my work at the school.  Among them are pastors, missionaries and youth workers.  What a privileged role and access to the young I have had.  There are so many past students who I do not know about today and eternity will reveal the usefulness of these year.
3. The personal development and learning I have experienced over these years. In particular, through people and projects at William Parker I have come to my present determinedly Christ/cross centred piety.  Interpreting Old and New Testaments in the light of the cross, centring worship on the Word in Scripture and in Sacrament as well, I have discovered in the course of fulfilling the work of a school chaplain.

Anyway, that was the last day and it’s meditation.  Today is the first day of what comes next.  And whatever comes next, let it be for Christ.

I was asked recently, “Why do you believe in God?”  That was a really good question.  It is far better than, “What is the evidence for God?” — as if there were a proof for His existence.

The Bible does not argue the case for the existence of God but simply and consistently assumes Him. The Apostle Paul asserts that deep down we all have a gut awareness of God.  Some people choose to suppress that sense; others choose to accept and even nurture it.

Scientific evidence is open to interpretation.  One interprets from a theistic (believing in God) perspective and another from an atheistic (not believing in God) perspective.  So our interpretation of scientific evidences will depend on our presuppositions and what we think about God.  To expect science to determine what we believe is to put the cart before the horse.

There is a common assumption that science has in some way disproved God or made belief in Him impossible for a thinking person.  This is patently not the case.  There are certainly some, or even many, scientists who do not believe in God, but there are also scientists who do believe in God.  There are bankers who believe in God and bankers who do not and that doesn’t prove anything either!

Actually, it is simply a matter of choice.  I choose to believe in, to worship and to serve God.  I do not make that choice contrary to reason.  In deed, it is a very reasonable choice to make.  I choose to believe because not to believe is unthinkable and unliveable.   To believe makes sense in itself and makes sense of everything else.  I am convicted by the Holy Spirit of God.  There could be no peace for me in rebelling against that conviction.  What God gives to me is faith, hope and love.  These three, the greatest of which is love, I would find nowhere else.  I choose to believe, and I could choose no other way.  What I find hard to believe is that anyone could not believe!

A few days in Bath have given opportunity to watch daughter Rachel on the sports field again.  An exciting hockey match demonstrated vigorous exertion as ladies competed on a freezing cold and very wet afternoon.  Discomfort did not deter Rachel’s team, nor did knowing that they were one goal down.

It is a wonderful parable of the Christian life which can sometimes be so very uncomfortable.  There is no place for discouragement.  We strive for excellence and exert ourselves to win!

And everyone who competes for the prize exercises self-control in all things. Now they do it to obtain a perishable crown, but we for an imperishable crown. (1 Corinthians 9²⁵)

If for the sake of a game girls fight for all they are worth, should not men take the kingdom by force.